Sunday, July 4, 2010

Could I be turning into a vampire?

by Brittany Geragotelis

Just got home today from vacation and although I'm not happy to be away from the beach, I don't exactly hate that I'm back home. Mostly because I'm here with my kitties, who are SO happy to see me! Just take a look at these pics...

Murray and Cohen causing trouble.

Murray saying hello.

Cohen giving me the evil eye.

Anyway, yesterday was my last day in Maryland and it was seriously a blast. In the morning, Matt and I went to get our hair cut, then we worked out (him running outside; me, doing the elliptical as I watched "The Real Housewives of New Jersey"--Oh, the drama!). After that, we shopped. And I'm talking, serious shopping. But how could we not? The deals were insane because we were at the outlet malls and it's 4th of July weekend. I think I came back with a whole new wardrobe.

Anyways, once we got home, we packed up a picnic dinner of sandwiches, chips, coleslaw and strawberries and jumped into the car with Matt and his parents. We headed to a nearby grassy hill to listen to the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra and watch some crazy fireworks. It was a beautiful night. A pleasant 80 degrees or so in the shade, and we listened to some great tunes as the sun went down. There had to be at least 5,000 people there, and the atmosphere was electric. Check out Matt here, with some of the crowd in the background!

While we were sitting there on our big blanket, eating our yummy picnic meal, I felt something wet hit my shoulder. And to my horror, I looked over and saw a big glop of poop on my arm. I quickly realized it wasn't just any old bird poop: it was BAT poop! As soon as the sun went down, the bats came out to play. And I had been poo-bombed by the mother-daddy of the fanged creatures!

This got me thinking: what if Twilight and "True Blood" had it all wrong. What if the secret human-to-vampire-change secret is in the poo, not in the blood? Maybe that's what all the vamps want you to believe, so they can more easily change humans to vamps. Hey, it's not totally far-fetched, right?

Suddenly I'm ravenous all the time, wearing sunglasses to block out the light and I'm a total night person. All vampire-like behavior, right?

So what if my hunger might actually be because I've been eating like a glutton all week on vacation and my appetite's grown in the process. And yeah, I may be wearing sunglasses now because I bought two new pairs at the beach. As for being a night person...I've sort of always preferred nighttime over daytime.

But still, I could've been infected, right? Now, I've just got to find my other vampish peeps and we can stir up some trouble....



Michelle said...

I'm more inclined to think 'zombie', what with the ravenous hunger. ;0

There's a bat under my eaves! But I live in Hawaii, so it's a little odd. He makes cooing noises at me when I sleep, too cute.

Brittany said...

I don't know, Michelle...the only bat in Hawaii, and he's set up camp at your house? Are you SURE it's not a vamp who's fallen in love with you (the human) and the two of you were meant to be this epic yet doomed love of the century? Hey, that might make a good book...but would anyone read it? Oh, wait...they already did. It was called "Every Vampire Book Ever Made."


Michelle said...

Oh man, I set myself up for that one.


Mary G said...

Interesting premise....I think I smell another novel! Or is it just the smell of poo?!?